For many, c-section birth is not the expected birth path. There are a few different types of c-section birth: unplanned, usually happening after labor has begun; scheduled, usually happening prior to labor for various reasons such as placental disorder, breech positioning, or elective; and emergency, which can occur either prior to labor or during labor.
Cesarean birth is still birth, but it is important to understand that it is a potential, and completely valid, way to give birth, even if you don’t expect it.
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How can you prepare for a potential or scheduled c-section birth?
Preparation before a cesarean birth can be tremendous in helping you navigate a sudden c-section or even a scheduled one. When we have taken the time to examine our options prior to birth, we can spend time prioritizing our preferences in order, having conversations with our providers on those preferences, and getting confirmation on what to expect in your birth location. If you are planning to give birth where there is not OR available, such as home birth or birth center, understanding what at transfer may look like, and then either with your midwife or a consult with the transfer hospital, learn what you could expect if you had to have a cesarean birth.
“My advice is to do your research. A c-section can be hard no matter how much you might understand it needs to happen, but the more you understand, the easier it is to accept and find strength in it.”
Unplanned C-section Birth Story after an Induction: Advocacy & Understanding Your Options
Establishing care with a team you truly trust can make a huge impact on your birth, regardless if you have a vaginal or cesarean birth. If you trust that if things do not go as planned that your team will help you navigate it, then it can make a huge difference in how we feel about our birth when we reflect on our experience.
Understanding the options available to you for cesarean birth, or if cesarean birth is the best option in your birth, can help you better navigate your birth experience. Discussing these options prior to birth, even if you don’t plan to have a c-section, can help you and your partner communicate your preferences in the event that you do need a c-section. You will be able to clearly explain what you want during your cesarean birth.
“At around 3-3:30-ish a resident doctor came did an internal exam and gave me a go-to start pushing. I wasn’t moving a lot after getting an epidural the right before So, I requested to be in an upright position for pushing but they told me I can’t and have to push laying down. After a bit of debate, they reclined my bed upright a little bit. The doctor kept telling me to curl and hold my breath to push on the count three. I pushed for almost 45 minutes not wanting to be pushing in that pattern but everything was happening too fast that I didn’t think of advocating for myself.
After 45 minutes another doctor came did an internal exam, and suspected fever. I did have a fever, and they gave me an option to keep pushing and deliver with forceps or to get a C-section. I believe I was just annoyed by the team that I jumped and said C-section which I regret. I had severe birth trauma and [postpartum] anxiety from the experience and had to go to therapy.
My advice for the mamas would be to advocate for themselves and their birth. It’s their experience for the lifetime and should always speak up if they feel something’s not going according to their vision, of course knowing all the risks and benefits of their decision.”
Emergency C-Section During Induction: Your body did not fail you
The hyper-focus on vaginal birth can make having a different birth plan feel like a failure. But your birth path taking a different route does not constitute failure: you cannot fail at birth.
“I had an emergency c-section (in fact, I never went into labor) in response to my daughter’s heart rate dropping after labor was induced (I had preeclampsia). It all happened very quickly: one minute I was taking a pre-labor nap, the next I was being woken by a room full of people repositioning me and trying to get my baby in a better position, putting their hands inside me, and pushing my bed down the hallway toward surgery. The experience was very traumatic and I never had a chance to mentally prepare for a c-section before I was anesthetized for surgery.
The biggest hurdle I faced in recovery was feeling like my body had failed me. I had so many questions about why what had happened, happened, and I never got answers from my medical team. (Continued below)
I subconsciously blamed myself. This feeling of failure contributed in part to my struggles with breastfeeding as well.
A couple of years have passed and I have healed my relationship with my body. Part of that process was recognizing that there is no “right” way to have a baby, no “right” way to feed a baby. There is what is right for you, for your unique time and situation. I have also learned that I need to fight for a care team I trust and that listens to me. And I have learned to love and be patient with my body, both in pregnancy and in healing from pregnancy.”
Emergency C-section Birth Story: Emotions can coexist
We can be both overjoyed that our baby has joined us earthside, but also mourn the birth we didn’t have. All of your feelings can coexist, and the existence of sadness or grief does not negate the love for your baby. The presence of sadness or grief over your birth experience does not mean that you are upset about your baby is here. Your feelings are all valid and should be respected.
“I had an emergency c-section with my first. My biggest advice, whenever I find out someone, I know had one too, is to be okay with grieving. A lot of the time this was not how we wanted our births to go and it’s okay to grieve that. Embracing and accepting your feelings is an important part of healing and moving on, no matter how you gave birth. Your feelings are valid and anyone who tries to brush them off because “at least you ended up with a healthy baby in the end” isn’t helping. Find your support group who will listen without judgment and don’t be ashamed of any of your feelings. Healing is a process and ignoring your feelings only prolongs it or makes it worse.”
Unplanned C-Section Birth Story: Support team and recovery can make a huge difference
You can still have support during a cesarean birth that is similar to a vaginal birth! It may not involve hip squeezes and counter pressure, but having someone hold space for you and your emotions, help advocate for your wishes, and to be by your side is so important. Comfort measures during a cesarean birth could include: cool towels on the face; massaging the shoulders, arm, neck, or face; narrating what is happening to the mother, such as “baby is about to be born,” or “can you hear him cry?”; and words of affirmation.
“First, think I underestimated how big of a surgery it really is. I had every intention of a vaginal delivery. I exercised, I moved, I squatted, I used the ball/ peanut ball, had my amazing doula, and was in so many different positions…Turns out her head was turned in such a way that despite contractions every 3-7 minutes for 48 hours, it just wasn’t happening. I thought it was the easy way out, and boy was a wrong.
Second, I also underestimated how much help you need. The biggest piece of advice is to be sure you have your partner, a friend, family member, etc, that can help you lift baby, help you adjust your positioning, bring/ make you food. I could barely sit up on my own for several days. My husband was amazing. I recognize that all mamas need a ton of support as well, but I didn’t realize how much in terms of a c section/ recovery.
Something little- I couldn’t even really wear the mesh undies because of the tightness- the actually depends were the best for immediate recovery! I had been given some from a friend and thought I’d never wear them (I bought some good postpartum undies) but it’s what I put on the most for the first couple of weeks.
Our doula was amazing. She brought some cool towels with essential oils into the OR. I puked while laying there and she laid them on my forehead which was incredible. She also stayed with me while my husband took baby and they finished suturing me.
Lastly, I started to feel significantly better after 7-10 days.”
Cesarean birth may not be your planned birth, but it is a possibility. In preparing for birth, it is also important to prepare for what you may want if you need a c-section. Understanding your options and preferences of those options can help you and your partner make decisions that support your birth experience in the event of plans suddenly change from vaginal to cesarean birth. If you have already discussed what you would like both with your partner and your medical care team, it can help ensure that you have a supportive birth experience that you still feel included in. Honoring how you may feel about the change in birth plans is valid and should be respected. You may feel grief at a lost experience, but the absolute joy that your baby is here. Emotions can co-exist, and do not negate one another.