Marisa’s Birth Story: Her Physical and Mental Preparation for an Unmedicated Birth

Gina: Welcome to the MamasteFit Podcast. In this episode, we have a birth story from one of our listeners. Marisa’s a physical therapist, and she’s going to be sharing her unmedicated hospital birth story of her second baby, where she used MamasteFit to help prepare more physically during her second birth. So thanks so much for being here, Marisa.

Marisa: Thanks for having me. I’m excited!

Gina: So let’s start with your pregnancy and how you were preparing for your second birth. Was it any different than how you were doing things in your first pregnancy?

Marisa: Yeah. So my first pregnancy, I actually had quite a bit of pain. I was in pain- I had pubic symphysis pain, I had SI pain starting at six weeks. I really am a big proponent of exercise- i’m actually a physical therapist- so during that time I was still trying to work out, but I think I was really focused on just being able to do everything that was quote unquote pregnancy safe. So not really focusing on the pain itself, just trying to keep working out as much as I could. But I was definitely limited. I didn’t focus on preparing my body for birth. I did a lot of mental preparation for my birth, for my first birth.

But this time around, actually during my first postpartum, I found MamasteFit and, was able to, I found your early postpartum workouts, and then I was able to do like your six week return to exercise program. And I found from a physical therapist perspective that what you guys are doing, and all of the movements and mobility exercises that you incorporate into your routines are… they really work! They really are helpful at keeping you out of pain. And so this time, I knew that I really wanted to incorporate all of those different exercises into my prenatal work. So I got all of your first, second, and third trimester programs and tried doing that. What I really liked about those was, not only are you incorporating strength training in a way that is going to help prevent pain, but also incorporating the like pelvic floor releases and the birth prep workouts.

So this time I really focused on preparing my body a little bit differently. I was able to do like the birth prep workouts. I did your birth prep circuit with the inversions and the hamstring and the adductor stretches and all of those, I did those, probably daily, at the end of my pregnancy.

So I think a lot of that really attributed to this, I guess you want to say, “success” of my birth, the second time around

Gina: It made things maybe a little bit, I could take credit for it, it made things a little bit quicker!

Marisa: Yes! Yeah, definitely.

Gina: So let’s get into the end of your pregnancy and into your labor. How was this pregnancy a little bit different with a toddler or, I don’t know how old your first was in comparison, and then going into your birth. How was this time different than your first birth?

Marisa: So obviously with the first birth, even first pregnancy, it’s like you can be on maternity leave before you go into labor and not have to worry about anyone else, so, that is the biggest difference I would say. My toddler’s 20, or he was 20 months when I gave birth, and he definitely needed a lot of my attention at the end of my pregnancy. I was off work. like I said, I’m a physical therapist, so our jobs are very physical, physically demanding, so I was able to get off work a little bit earlier, so I stayed home with him, but that was a lot of work. That was almost more work, than actually being at work itself! But I’d try to keep up with him. I was able to do like daily walks and I really tried to do my workouts. I tried to incorporate two strength training workouts a week and a pelvic floor release workout a week, and a birth prep workout at the end as well.

And like I said, compared to my first birth, I was really preparing mentally through Hypnobirthing classes. But I think that I forgot about the physical aspect, that birth is just really, it’s a whole, it’s a whole thing physically as well. And the difference between the two, I would say my mental prep for the first one was a big focus, and then the second one, my physical prep was the main factor here. Not to say that I, I did try and do some mental prep as well, but with the toddler, that’s difficult too.

Gina: It makes it a little bit harder.

Marisa: It’s so hard. And I tried to incorporate him into workouts, as well, but, he’s all over the place and trying to get into things and slamming on the mirror and so it’s a whole thing! But yeah, I would say, the biggest difference is my physical prep this time around.

Gina: So let’s get into your birth story. So how did labor begin for you? And/or, did you know that it began or were you like in denial?

Marisa: Yeah, I was definitely in denial. That’s what I keep telling people. So, in comparison, my first birth, I was in labor for 48 hours. It was a long and difficult labor. I started it with contractions at night with my first, and then went into the hospital during the day, the next day. My water broke at the hospital actually, and it was a big gush.

So, this time around, we woke up, I was 38 weeks, 38 and one- and then, compared to my last birth, I was 40 and five- so I wasn’t really expecting to go into labor that early. It was the day before Easter, it was a Saturday. We went, we had some plans to go visit some local flower fields with some friends. And I woke up that morning and I thought, I had a little extra discharge that I thought was pretty normal for at the end of pregnancy. I texted my doula, and she was like, “As long as there’s not blood, like that’s pretty normal. So we head out the door, we get there, and I actually, I texted my friend on the way, I said, “Can you bring me some more panty liners? I am, I’m leaking a little bit more than I thought!” and still in denial, like, thinking that was just end of pregnancy discharge.

We were having fun there. At around 11, 11:30 I notice- and I’m wearing a dress, like a gray dress, so I’m aware of like bodily fluids that are coming out of me- but, then I noticed that there was like fluid at the bottom, like at my ankle, and I’m still in denial thinking, “Wow, that’s just a lot of discharge.”

Gina: LOTS of vaginal discharge is the end of pregnancy.

Marisa: Yeah. I’m like, “What is this?” And then I even asked my friends who are there, all have kids, they’re like, “Yeah, I don’t know. Maybe that is your water. Maybe it’s not.” The funny part was my doula, she was on call at that time, for me, for my birth, but she had one day where her son was having a fourth birthday party, and she said she wasn’t going to be available during the day, and that was the day.

Gina: Of course.

Marisa: And so I texted her in the morning and she texted me back, but then the whole rest of the day, she was busy at the birthday party. And so I was like, “Whatever, we’ll just, we’ll figure it out.”

And so we left the flour fields around 12, 12:30, had a really delicious strawberry ice cream sundae, or milkshake, so that was basically like my last meal. And then, yeah, we went home. I had no contractions or anything. I decided while my son was down for a nap that I was going to just rest on the couch. It was actually on my list of things to do to clean the bathroom and do a few other things to like nest at the end of my pregnancy, but I was tired from, being out all morning. And, so I called the doctor and I said, “My contractions haven’t started yet. Is this my water?” And he kind of like, “I don’t know, it could be. We could have you come in the morning.” He’s pretty hands off, which I like about him. And so we decided that if nothing were to progress, I was going to come in the morning, at six, seven in the morning to just make sure that- is that my water? Is it not?

So we came up with that plan, and laid on the couch. I even told my husband, he had a scheduled haircut, and so I said, “Why don’t you go to your haircut?” -this was at like 1:45- “Go to your haircut, come back. You could go to Costco, pick up some stuff for dinner the next day. Get some gas in the car,” like, he was out running errands. And so he got home, I think around three, four o’clock, and actually I was like, “Maybe this is my water. Maybe I should start preparing.” And with the second, I just was not as prepared as the first. My hospital bags were not packed. I had a list of things that I needed to pack, but, that was the time where I was like, “Maybe I should start packing things.” And meanwhile, my toddler woke up from his nap. My husband’s still out, but my toddler’s getting into my makeup, there’s blush on the wall, like the, it was a whole mess with me trying to pack.

But around four o’clock is when some light contraction started. I was able to breathe through them and they were probably about six minutes apart, lasting 30 seconds or so. And, I still was like, “Huh, maybe this will happen in the next few days.” And I don’t know why I was in denial, but I think just ’cause I was maybe much earlier than what I thought was going to happen. But then we decided to go on a walk around the neighborhood at around 6:30. Our whole family- my husband, my dog, my son- we went on a walk around the neighborhood. And they start to get a little bit closer together, but I’m talking, I’m walking. Everything is very manageable. And then, that was when we were trying to figure out, okay, when are we going to drop off my son to- we were going to drop him off at a friend’s house, we don’t have any family that lives close by- we were going to drop our son off at a friend’s house. They knew, I had updated her on when, or what, was happening.

And so at around 7:00 PM we drove over to their house. I had maybe one or two contractions in the car, everything was manageable. We get there, set up his sleep area, I say goodbye. I was very emotional. And I think I had maybe one or two contractions at her house as well, but, thought it was still like, “This is going to happen maybe in like the next day,” I thought it was going to last so long.

And, so then, we get home and I decide I wanted to get into the bath. So I get into the bathtub, I put on my Hypnobirthing, meditations, start relaxing- and I think that’s when the contractions started like getting a little bit closer together, a little bit more intense. I think they were probably around four to five minutes apart. I could still breathe and talk and everything, but then I was like, “We should probably go,” and let me add, during the middle of my pregnancy, my doctor actually changed locations at where he was going to deliver at. So what was going to be a 20 minute drive ended up turning into a 45 minute drive, and so I had to factor that in as well. With my first birth, we showed up to the hospital, and I still was in the hospital for 30 more hours before I delivered, so I didn’t want that to happen, but I also didn’t want to get there too late. So I decide at that time, like, they’re getting close together. Maybe this is going to happen sooner than I thought. So we call the doula and my doctor and say, “We’re on our way. it’s a 45 minute drive, but we’re on our way.”

And then in the car, I’m pretty sure I realized after the fact that was when I was going through transition, my husband even asked, “Hey, do you want me to put down some of those puppy pads like on the front seat, just in case? “And I was like, “No, I’m fine.” Like, “It’s okay.” We probably should have done that. But everything’s good! We, so in the car, my husband had the GPS up and I was timing my contractions based off of the amount of time that was left on the drive down. And I realized that they were about two to three minutes apart, and this is when I started getting a little quieter, as far as I wasn’t able to talk as much. And my husband says, things were, a lot, I was moaning, I was, it was a lot deeper, instead of more relaxed. Like things were, I was going a little bit deeper this time. And he was like, “Ah, I think we probably need to get there soon.”

We pull up, he makes it in about 40 minutes, which is good. We get there. He leaves the car in the front. We have to get wheeled up to triage, which is on the second floor. He leaves me there in the wheelchair in the hands of the nurses and he goes back down to move the car. And, then, the nurse asked me to give a urine sample and I was like, “Okay… i’m like really trying to, breathe through these contractions now, but I’ll try to sit on the toilet and go to the bathroom….” So I sit down and I’m like, there’s no way I can relax enough. And then at that point I sit down and I tell her that I feel the need to push, and she starts freaking out, and she does a cervical exam on the toilet and realizes that I was 10 centimeters, so, from the toilet. Then my husband comes back, luckily, from the car, and we get onto the gurney in triage, but they had no time to actually check me in.

They roll me from triage to Labor and Delivery- and mind you, I wasn’t even checked into the system, I am not quote unquote a “patient” yet because it was just so fast. So we get up on to Labor and Delivery. My doula makes it, she gets there in time and there was a lot of hustle and bustle because I think that they realize like things are going to happen quick. And the nice part about it, which I was really thankful for, with my first birth, I was, because I was there so much earlier, I was able to set up like an amazing, birth space, dark kind of candle lit, I had music- it was very serene, what I wanted. But this was pretty chaotic. I had a whole birth plan set, printed out this time and I was all ready to give it to them, but there was no time. But, the nurse while I went from the gurney to the Labor and Delivery bed, I just hopped onto hands and knees, which was very intuitive for me, I really wanted to attempt not pushing on my back. And I knew this whole time that my goal was to try to go unmedicated, which maybe was part of the reason why I felt like I wanted to be in denial all day, just to push it off.

But I get onto hands and knees and the Labor and Delivery nurse asked me mid chaos, is there anything that you wanted specifically for your birth? And I was like, “Oh yeah, maybe I should let them know this is what I want.” So they turned the lights down. They were able to, my doula and my husband were able to put on the galaxy lights that I wanted, they turned the music on. There was still quite a bit of people there, but just ’cause I think there was a lot of hustle and bustle. And, we get down, or, I get onto hands and knees, they’re trying to get the IV in for, no, not an IV, they’re trying to do a blood draw. And then, all I remember, my doctor was not there yet, and there was a midwife on call and she was great, she introduced herself. And, she was very hands off, which I also appreciated. She gave me the cue when I was pushing to relax your pelvic floor and as a physical therapist that just clicked. And I had been doing my own pelvic floor PT, throughout pregnancy and really working on, with, through all of your workouts, releases, and mobility to be able to let my body to get in the right position, and the baby to get into the right position. But that cue, for some reason, just really helped mid chaos.

So I’m on hands and knees with the head of the bed elevated and I think I go through a few contractions while they’re trying to do an IV, and my doula, she’s there, she’s rubbing my back. My husband’s up by my face, giving me some words of encouragement. And two minutes of pushing, I pushed out our beautiful little son, and it was amazing. It was just like a very redemptive birth. I get chills just thinking about it because I feel guilty sometimes thinking about my first birth as like a not successful birth, because my whole plan was to go unmedicated, and that did not happen. I pretty much got every intervention under the sun besides a C-section, and so it was still a beautiful delivery for him. I, like I said, I had the serene environment, but this time, I felt so powerful. I felt like almost primal being on my hands and knees and pushing him out. Like I know you’ve talked about the fetal ejection reflex and I felt that! It really felt like I was, like, pooping him out. It is so weird to say, but yeah, it was, that was the feeling.

And I was able to grab him in between my legs and I turned around and that’s the time that my doctor showed up- just a little late! But I grabbed him and put him on my chest and I was in shock. Like I think I was in shock, not that 38 weeks is early, but I was just not prepared. And then I was in shock for what just happened throughout the day. And mind you, we got to the hospital 24 minutes before delivering. So it was like a whole like, I don’t know, like I keep saying it was chaos, but like in a peaceful, beautiful way. And I, think my quotes were like, “What just happened? What just happened?” I was in shock for days after just trying to comprehend what went on. And I hate to even say this because my first birth was the opposite of this, but my doula, she said, “My favorite thing that you said afterwards was, ‘It’s just weird, but, I didn’t have any pain during that!'” And it was like, it was such a, I think so much oxytocin, so much adrenaline, that, like, I said, I hate to even say that it wasn’t painful because it was like, I was really, trying to breathe through those contractions at the end. But I think the pros outweighed the cons, or I don’t know. It was just the way that I felt just very empowered, maybe outweighed the pain.

Gina: What time did your contraction start, and then when was he born?

Marisa: Contractions started at 11:30 in the morning, and then he was born at 10:39 PM, so a little less than 12 hours.

Gina: But they really picked up what?

Marisa: Eight o’clock.

Gina: Okay.

Marisa: Nine o’clock.

Gina: So it was still a fairly short active labor timeframe, which was probably shocking compared to the first time.

Marisa: Exactly.

Gina: I find that when you’re in your own environment and you feel very like supported in it, and when things are just progressing really quickly, that the pain of the contractions are not as prominent in your mind.

Marisa: Yeah.

Gina: Especially if there’s like a lot of other stuff going on. So I could totally believe that it was like a, maybe not a pain-free experience.

Marisa: Yeah.

Gina: But it made the pain probably wasn’t the main focal point.

Marisa: Yeah.

Gina: In that experience.

Marisa: There’s a whole thing that I’ve been reading about is like the fear, pain, tension relationship. And I was very fearful in my first birth and I think that caused a lot of pain and tension and it was like an endless circle. And this time it wasn’t that I wasn’t fearful, but I knew what to expect and I was like, it can’t get any worse than the last time. But I think I was in a different head space mentally and I was less fearful, so I think I was just like more open. And I think, like I said, the denial like really helped.

Gina: Yeah, absolutely. That was how it was from my first, between like my next three, was my first felt so much more painful, and I think a lot of it was because of that fear, tension, pain cycle. I was very scared, and then it would cause me to tense up during my contractions, which then made them more painful, which then made me more scared. And so I think that made things much worse during my first labor compared to my next three, where I also went unmedicated and they were on the quicker side. But I, wasn’t as, I was still nervous, but I wasn’t scared at any point and so it didn’t ever reached that point of overwhelm. For me, just because I was less scared and I understood it a little bit more.

So how was postpartum for you?

Marisa: I loved this postpartum because I didn’t have pain. Like the pain, the recovery was so much better. The first postpartum I didn’t have a perineal tear, but I had vaginal focus tear, so internal tear, and I was in a lot of pain. Like I think I couldn’t even go for a walk up until like week two, just because I was in so much pain just standing. And so this time around I definitely had it in my head that I was going to take it a little bit easier this time, no matter how I felt. So I did a lot more just laying low around the house. But because I had the less pain, I had a first degree tear, the doctor described it as like a paper cut. He did have to add some stitches just because it was right on an artery, but, physically, I actually I felt good maybe day five, where I was able to like actually stand up without, stand up without any pain. I was still bleeding up until like week three or week four, which is fairly normal- but I had a lot of help as well. My parents who live out of state actually, they changed their flights and they came early, so they were able to help, which was the biggest blessing because having a toddler and being able to care for yourself and care for the baby, that’s hard. So my husband was home from work, which is helpful too, but I wasn’t able to focus on my healing and bonding with the baby, which was good.

Gina: So what advice would you give to somebody who is wanting to have an unmedicated birth and they’re beginning their preparation process?

Marisa: It’s definitely a mental game, and it’s definitely a physical game. You have to prepare for both. I think, like I said, the first time around, I focused a lot on the mental preparation, which was helpful. But for me, I really needed to focus on that physical prep. So this time around, I think I had the mental prep from the previous birth, and so I was able to get into that meditative state a little bit easier this time than the last time.

But then the physical prep, I think I would recommend to people, not just continuing your workouts the same as you normally would. Just, the biggest thing I did last time was I had to make sure that they were pregnancy safe. This time, I focused on the pelvic floor releases and mobility and strength training in a way that promoted openness in my body to allow for an easier path for baby.

Gina: Absolutely. Thank you so much for sharing your birth story on our podcast and for choosing us to support you in this second, well, for your first postpartum and your second pregnancy. And you’re in our mentorship program, which is also really exciting!

Marisa: Yeah!

Gina: So thank you again for coming on. Do you have any last minute advice for any of our listeners?

Marisa: I guess, follow along with MamasteFit. You guys offer really great things, even on Instagram free resources. I’ve paid for almost all of your programs and I think like they really are, coming from a movement specialist myself, like you guys really do provide it all. It’s not, I keep saying this, but it’s not just pregnancy safe, but it’s going to help you prevent pain, it’s going to help you prepare for labor and delivery and birth. So yeah, I really, I love what you guys do.

Gina: Thank you for choosing us to support you and for coming on the podcast.

Marisa: Yeah! Thank you for having me.

Gina: Thanks so much for listening to this week’s episode. If you want more support throughout your pregnancy, check out our online prenatal fitness programs and our online childbirth education course. Our prenatal fitness programs are designed for pregnancy. It’s not just a bunch of pregnancy safe exercises, these are exercises that we have found to be incredibly beneficial for our in-person prenatal clients and for our online prenatal fitness clients. Our exercises are designed to help you stay pain-free throughout your pregnancy, to help you feel strong throughout your pregnancy, and most importantly, to help prepare you for birth and for the postpartum ’cause prenatal fitness is not just about this specific phase of life, it’s also about setting us up for success in the future. And you can bundle our prenatal fitness programs with our childbirth education course that is designed to help teach you the science of birth. There’s a lot of fear involved with birth because of the unknown-ness of it, and our childbirth education course helps to explain what is happening in a way that’s simple to understand so that you don’t have to be quite as scared of this experience.

You can check out all of our prenatal support courses on our website at mamastefit.com and use code STORY10 to get 10% off any of our online offerings, to include our bundles, which are already 15% off.

This podcast is sponsored by Needed. Needed is nutrition company that specializes in optimizing nourishment for the perinatal timeframe, and you can use our code MAMASTEPOD to get 20% off your order.